Thursday 1 September 2011

DIY... we trust you.

Every city and town in the world has a mix of honest and dishonest people. I'm not sure about you but I have dealt with my fair share of sneaky Russians in my life and have been left with a cautious attitude, especially towards strangers. Perhaps it is because of this cautious attitude that I have been absolutely amazed at how trustworthy these Australians are.

You are probably expecting me to talk about the fact that few houses here have fences and burglar guards and this is because it is a relatively safe country to live in. While this is great to see, my point is actually elsewhere.

Lets start with the trams that are found in Melbourne. These trams are run on a kind of trust system. You can purchase a ticket either on the tram or from one of the various stores around the city. Once you've boarded with your ticket, at some point during your trip you are supposed to feed it into a machine to date stamp it. Your daily, weekly or monthly ticket is then valid on or from that date for the specified duration. I usually buy a week ticket, stamp it when I first use it and, as long as its on me, never have to produce it again unless I'm asked to. There are the occasional ticket inspectors who ride the trams once in a blue moon but even then, they barely ask to check your ticket. If you are caught you'll be slapped with $180 fine and many a dirty look from your fellow passengers. Trust me, the dirty looks are worse than the dent to your pocket.

I have been on the receiving end of those dirty looks when I made the catastrophic mistake of boarding a rather full tram and standing on the steps as opposed to on the main floor. I waited blissfully for the tram to go and then, nothing. The tram did not budge. One by one my fellow passengers turned and began to glare at me as if I was pedalling drugs to 5 year old children. With the reaction speed of a Manatee it eventually dawned on me that I was at fault. I took one step up onto the main level and with that universe was returned back to normal. As I hung my head in shame and the Gov distanced herself from me, the tram rolled on.

Note to self: Dont stand on the tram steps.

Coles is to Australia what Checkers and Spar is to South Africa. We had taken a whirl around the shop to stock up on supplies and then joined one of the lines to pay. The line next to us was a little shorter and the Gov mentioned that we should join it. I explained that we couldn't as that line was for self payment or self check out or whatever you want to call it. The blank look on the Gov's face prompted further elaboration. The trusting people who run the trams must also work for Coles. If you have cash on you when you are checking out you can head to one of the self service tills, scan your products, pop your money in and leave. Clearly I am not the only person in this relationship with a little criminal side to them as the Gov, who's jaw was now slack, said "imagine the possibilities".

So there you have it. Apart from the Gov and I you will mostly find honest, law abiding and trustworthy people in Australia.

Tuesday 30 August 2011

The Australian Museum - a prerequisite

Firstly, I would like to apologies to my two loyal fans, namely my wife and my mother for not having written for so long. A move to a new country will put most things on the back burner for a few months.

The Australian Museum is not exactly the hippest or most trendy place to visit in Sydney. With the Sydney Harbour Bridge, the Opera House, the beautiful Royal Botanical Gardens and the Sydney Tower, just to name a few, the museum is not the normal port of call for people who are new to the city. Unless of course you are a senior citizen and someone left the gates open at the nearby old age home.  However, if you'll bare with me you shall see that there is method to my madness.

To be honest, the Gov and I stumbled across the museum quite by chance as we were strolling through Hyde Park on our way to the Royal Botanical Gardens. There are many well kept old buildings flanking the park and you would think the museum would be just another. It would be if it weren't for the head and tail of a dinosaur sticking out opposite ends of the building. This clever little marketing trick did its job and the Gov and I plodded across the road to investigate further.

Rexy was rubbish at Hide and Seek.

We forked out $14 each at the front desk which included a limited tour of the Birds of Paradise exhibit. Again, this may not sound like an interesting idea but if you think the Australians are a unique bunch then check out their exotic birds and to be more precise, their mating dances. Special indeed.

The rest of the museum proved to be a labyrinth of buildings, rooms, hallways, staircases and lifts. If the museum shop stocked Satellite Navigation devices they would make an absolute killing. After a series of u-turns, wild guesses and pure blind luck we managed to get through all of the exhibits. We visited the Aborigines exhibit, Australias first people...
The Skeleton exhibit...
Because every skeleton, and his dog, deserve some quiet time.

The Dinosaur exhibit...

The unsuspecting tourist never saw Rexy coming.

Finally we reached the reason for this post. We found the "Surviving Australia" section. A shiver shot down my back as I read the sign and found myself wandering what kind of country has to devote an entire exhibit, and a large one at that, to creatures that can kill you in under 10 minutes! There is even a smaller exhibit within that shows you what to expect in your very own back yard. It crossed my mind then and there that this could be seen as a form of population control and a highly effective one at that.

There are too many villains of the animal kingdom to mention them all so I will focus on the meanest. Lets start with the sea and the Box Jellyfish. This nasty son of a gun is found between the months of October and April predominantly along the shores of Northern Australia, Northern Western Australia and Northern Queensland. Keep in mind that the North is the hottest part of Australia, especially in the Summer months and that's exactly when these nasty little critters arrive. Someone is laughing somewhere. Its body is box shaped and is roughly 20cm by 20cm. Its tentacles can number up to 15 in total and can stretch up to 3 metres in length. These tentacles possess some of the most dangerous venom on the planet. You have virtually no chance of surviving the venomous sting. The pain is so excruciating and overwhelming that you will most likely go into shock before reaching the shore.

Then there are the Blue Ringed Octopus. This little ninja is the size of a golf ball and as cute as a button but its beak is strong enough to bite through a wetsuit and kill an adult in minutes. Best of all, there is no known antidote.

Sea snakes, Saltwater Crocodiles, Cone shells, Scorpion Fish, Lion fish, Stone fish, Sharks and Stingrays are the other killers found in the waters of Australia. You have to ask yourself - how is it that there are so many Australia surfers out there?

On land Australia has 20 of the 25 most venomous snakes in the world. The most poisonous snake in the world is called the Taipan who's venom is strong enough to kill about 100 adults with just a single bite. Are you kidding me???? When this creature was thought up by the powers that be they must have been thinking of making humans the size of a small mountain range. The Brown Snake and the Tiger Snake follow just as behind and the locals reckon you don't need to put the siren on while you drive to the hospital.

The Funnel Web, Redback (cousin of the Black Widow) and White Tail are all spiders found pretty much throughout Australia. The Redback particularly is said to be in every back yard. All three of these bad boys will kill you if you do not get immediate medical attention after being bitten.

Spidey bought his friends along.

Last but not least I come to a bird. Not just any bird mind you but a bird that was described in the museum as ill-tempered and aggressive.

One of these two birds is ill-tempered.

A Cassowary is a large flightless bird that is similar to an Ostrich but slightly smaller. Found in North Eastern Australia they possess a dagger like claw on each of their three toes. The centre claw can measure up to 12,5 cm in length and was described by Ornithologist Thomas E. Gilliard, in his book Living Birds of the World, as a murderous nail that can sever an arm or eviscerate an abdomen with ease. Even though the Cassowary sounds like it has been pulled off the pages of a Stephen King novel, there has only ever been one reported death from the hundreds of Cassowary attacks. The report, however, failed to mentioned how many one armed or one legged men the Cassowaries were responsible for so I have decided to steer clear of North Eastern Australia altogether.

If for some reason you are contemplating a move to Australia please ensure that you stop by the Australian Museum in Sydney first to see what you are in for. If the little museum shop sold return flights and a taxi cab to the airport along with the satellite navigation devices, they'd be millionaires.

Sunday 17 April 2011

Alpine Heath

Our favourite local holiday destination is the Drakensberg. This can be anywhere from an hours drive to 5 hours drive, depending on which parts you go too. Generally, the further you go from Durban, the more impressive the mountains become.

A few months back we snuck off to Alpine Heath with some friends for a long weekend. The plan was simple, lots of exercise during the day by way of hiking, swimming, tennis, fly fishing and squash followed by beers and a braai each night. No complaints there.

Alpine Heath nestled in the mountain.

Four of us arrived before the rest of the group and as the day was a postcard of bright sun and blue sky, we decided to dump the bags, take a hike and unpack when we got back.

Fairly open...

...and easy most of the way...

...with a sprinkling of rock jumping here and there.

Mother nature decided that it was time for a curve ball. What started out as a picture perfect day soon had us holding onto our hats and other body parts as some of the strongest winds I've felt in a while decided to pay us a visit.

The slicked back look sans gel.

The only part of the trip that left us scratching our head was the "No open fire" rule at Alpine Heath. This was a bit of a problem as all we had brought with us for supper was braaivleis. We were then told that we could hire a gas braai from them at a cost of R50 a night so we could at least cook our meat. Now, I'm not sure about you but having to braai on a gas braai is about as manly as going for a facial. Needless to say, our idea of a perfect night around a large open fire with guitars playing and sharing wild stories of our bravery during our hikes was reduced to 8 people crowded around a small plastic table with a candle as our only source of warmth.

The following day the eight of us set off to investigate the opposite mountains. I should have guessed something would go wrong due to the fact that Jimmy was on the hike with us. Picture a guy well over 6 foot who weighs over 100kgs and has more energy than a six year old toddler on a sugar high. A recipe for trouble indeed. What started out as a gentle stroll soon turned into a cross country sprint that would have made Gebrselassie proud. Luckily, my athletic, racing snake physique kept me just ahead of the big lug which was a good thing until I came across a snake on the path. I pulled up the proverbial handbrake and stopped just in time only to have Jimmy run straight into the back of me and edge me even closer to the savage beast. Fortunately it was only a Spotted Skaapsteker and apart from a sore bite did not pose too much of a threat. The ironic thing about this little incident is that it is usually the Gov who is like catnip for snakes as she has encountered snakes on our last 3 visits to the berg. At least I kept the tradition going.

Alpine is a pleasant spot to go to and has all the necessary bits and pieces for a decent family getaway but as the name of this blog suggests, I am a pyromaniac and a cold night in the berg without a wood fire just doesn't seem right and I'm sure it is actually illegal in some far off country somewhere.

Friday 8 April 2011

The worm wins... so far.

In my previous blog, I mentioned that a few lunatics at the Govs work decided to take on my bottle of Mezcal with the intention of finishing off the worm.

Alas, I have no pictures to show you as the boys, as hard as they did try, polished off  most of the Mezcal but couldn't bring themselves to eat the worm. The Gov, who was also spotted enjoy a sneaky tot, has said that the bottle is still in the hands of the mad men who, if they ever find the courage, will finish the bottle AND the worm.

Until then....

Tuesday 5 April 2011

Mezcal explained.

Tequila. Mexican tequila, to be exact. Apparently the drink of choice when in Mexico. If the world went by what Hollywood and the marketing giants portrayed, we'd all picture a typical Mexican as a sombrero wearing, guitar tickling, tequila drinking person. But are we right?

Sombrero's, as popular as they were way back when, are definitely out nowadays and only the educated few have caught on to the fact that playing a guitar is the quickest way to a woman's heart. When it comes to tequila as the drink of choice, this is almost true.

Introducing: Mezcal

Mezcal is a close second to Tequila when it comes to popularity and is the drink you are generally thinking of that has a worm inside the bottle. Made in Oaxaca from the Maguey plant, mezcal has a strong smokey flavour and is drunk straight without any salt or lemon. Its 38% alcohol content is certainly not the strongest alcohol around but is still a force to be reckoned with.

The Gov had received a few requests for souvenirs from the lads at her work and made the mistake of bringing back a few single-shot bottles of mezcal containing mini worms from Cancun. Not content with their minuscule rations the guys were soon begging for more like a bunch of modern day Oliver Twists. Not one to disappoint, the Gov commandeered a super sized bottle from yours truly. After convincing me that it was in the interests of science, I gave in under one condition.... "I want pictures of someone eating the worm!"

The worm of the hour.

It turns out that the scientific experiment is to see whether these certifiable people can survive a dance with the worm tomorrow night at a drinks evening.

Tune in tomorrow.

Sunday 3 April 2011

Cancun, Mexico

Once we had conquered rustic Mexico like a pack of marauding Spaniards, we arrived at the Crowne Paradise Hotel in the hotel stretch of Cancun. Everything was included in the price so we simply had to drop our bags off, meet up with the final group of our family get together and we were set for the next week.

The view from our balcony.

After sorting out the small matter that the check-in staff had no booking on their system for the Gov and I, despite taking our cash quite happily 4 weeks prior, we eventually got into our room.

Our room.

We were fortunate enough to be in the one tower that didn't allow kids so hopefully we'd be able to get some sleep. You have to understand that Cancun is absolutely packed with either drunk college students screaming at each other or families with four little kids screaming at each other. Now that's a lot of screaming so being in the "no kids" tower was a gift from Yoda.

The plan of attack in Cancun is simple. Wake up, eat greasy food, lie by the pool or beach and fry yourself. Eat more greasy food for lunch with Corona or Margarita. Assume frying position again and drink more to drown out the screaming kids. A third helping of greasy food for supper and drinks and then wash it all down with Tequilas at the bar afterwards. Head back to your room to pass out and wake up and start process all over again. For some reason, we couldn't seem to feel any affect from the drinks that we were consuming. This was especially apparent when the Gov finished her fourth fishbowl sized Margarita and was still standing. This is impressive as usually after 2 glasses of anything she is howling at the moon. We were convinced that the Mexicans were being sneaky Russians again and watering the stuff down. So we headed to the bar and demanded Tequilas! Lots of them! By the next morning, we eventually found what we were looking for... a hangover.

Its game time!

There are the usual games and activities on offer. Water rides, jet ski's, parasailing, scuba diving, snorkelling, windsurfing, putt putt, volleyball, shops, arcades, basketball and the list goes on. At night, you could book from five or six different themed resaurants ranging from Mexican and Italian, to Japanese and French. This basically meant that you were eating the same greasy food diguised as something else.

We went to the Wild West Restaurant on one of our last nights. After a few watered down drinks my brother in law and I decided it was time to tackle the mechanical bull. After a quick signature assuring our hosts that we would not sue them, we each took a turn. I'm a little red faced to admit that neither of us could last very long. But having said that, the fact that my brothers session of 15 seconds was the record of the night proves that that is one psychotic bull!

Outdone by a ginger... eish!

We only had one run in with some yanks and this was lead, obviously, by my sister who is a NOT to be messed with! There's a rule around the pools that you may not book the poolside chairs by any means. Regardless of this, people would get up at 6am to run down to the pool and wrap their towels around the chairs and leave them there til about 9am or 10am when they felt like claiming them. This was not on for my sister who  marched up to two of them and folded up the towels and proceeded to claim the chairs for herself and her hubby. An hour or so later an American couple arrived and inquired as to what happened to the chairs they booked. With a growl my sister snapped "Read the sign buddy" and gestured for him to take a hike. The only response the poor yank could muster was "You shouldn't touch other peoples stuff" and slunk away with his tail between his legs. Lets just say that my sister will never be an Ambassador for our country.

We took a trip into the main town of Cancun and found out where all the crazy parties took place.

Everyones favourite!

A bit of shopping for the Gov.

Had a bite to eat.

Took in some general sightseeing.

We really enjoyed our trip to Cancun and if it weren't for the constant wind, and by that I mean the entire week, and the length of the journey, it would be one of the top vacation destinations for the entire world.

Friday 1 April 2011

Fightforce 12

Now I know that MMA or Mixed Martial Arts is not everyones cup of tea but last night was the South Africa vs Northern Ireland clash at the Durban Exhibition Centre and the patriotism flowed as freely as the beer. I continually invite the Gov who has had some Jiu Jitsu training but refuses to come along and can't understand how I enjoy watching two half naked, sweaty men rolling around on the floor whilst hugging each other. Come to think of it, when you look at it that way, it does seem a bit odd.

Nevertheless, I went with my cousin, Needles, named so for the lack of visible strength in his lower legs and a great time was had by all. Twelve fights and only one of them making it out of the first round! A highlight was watching Needle's friend, Dain Neveling, fighting in the lead up fight to the two main fights. Dain won with some great striking against Ryan de Vasconsellos and finished it off with some strong ground n' pound.

Hector Britz vs Boyd Allen

The international fights saw a surprise loss for Martin "The Punisher" Van Staden to Ali Maclean by way of North South choke. Van Staden dominated in the standup, getting the better of Maclean in the early exchanges and eventually knocking the Irishman down with a left hook to the chin.Van Staden immediately pounced on him and unloaded some heavy shots which Maclean absorbed. Maclean made his way back to his feet and got caught in a standing guillotine. Van Staden pulled guard in an attempt to choke out his opponent but Maclean showed some excellent Jiu Jitsu skills as he reversed the position and got the tap out with a choke of his own.

The second international fight was in Middleweight division and saw Donavin "Bam Bamz" Hawkey secure the win over Lee McKibbin. The Irishmen charged him in the first few seconds of the fight aiming for the takedown but got caught by Hawkey in a standing guillotine. Hawkey, with his super strength, choked his opponent who tapped before the two of them even reached the ground.

So 1 - 1 it was by the end of the night and congratulations to all the winners. The full results can be found, in a day or two, on http://www.fightforce.co.za/ . For those of you who are a little lost and think I am speaking Greek, check out some Jiu Jitsu chokes and techniques on Youtube. Start with http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6pnG0Gxd5kk for an explanation on the North South Choke. Stay tuned for the next fightforce competition.

Wednesday 30 March 2011

Tulum, Mexico

We spent 10 days in Mexico as part of our my Uncles 50th birthday celebrations. We spent the first 3 days in the village of Tulum and then 7 days in the Crowne Palace Hotel in Cancun. Yip, thats right. The place where all the American youngsters flock to for the warm weather, huge parties and the main reason which is the drinking age is 18 instead of 21 as it is in the US.

Before I get started, take a look at the picture of the Gov and I on the front page. Who looks more dodgy and possibly suspicious? I think I win that comparison hands down. Clearly the yanks have had an influx of petit, innocent looking girls trying to get up to mischief in their country. Through our groups journey in and out of the states, the Gov was "randomly" selected and searched three times on different days. Work that one out!

We landed at the airport and organised a hire van to get our crowd down to Tulum which is about 2 hours south of the Airport. After avoiding a few scams from various shady locals we set off on our trip which is always fun with a car full of people who have never driven on the right side of the road before.


Le Nuestro Petit Hotel.

Tulum is a great little town. Its fairly rustic, especially when compared to Cancun and so was our accommodation at Le Nuestro Petit Hotel. You can't drink the water in the village and we were encouraged by the russian manager to not throw anything into the toilet, even toilet paper after its intended use. We should rather use the bin next to the toilet instead. Needless to say that none of us could actually bring ourselves to do this so we flushed the dodgy paper and left dummy pieces of clean toilet paper in the little bins. (Apologies to the hotel owner if she ever reads this.)

We were also asked to only run our airconditioners when we were in the rooms. This idea, too, did not last very long and pretty soon we had our own private fridges to sleep in while in the sweltering heat of Mexico.

You can walk around the village all day and all night long visiting bars, restaurants and various shops. Things are reasonably priced and a few late nights were enjoyed by all. In the morning we would have our free continental breakfast at our little hotel which was more like a B&B actually. Please note the "continental breakfast" in Mexico means a toasted roll with jam on it and some paw paw. The tea is weak and the coffee is so strong that it is probably used as engine cleaner if not consumed.

The main reason we used Tulum as our base was because the very next day we were all going to Xelha. (Pronounced Shelha.)

Xelha

This was a natural, supersized water park and for a certain amount you arrived at 8:30am and left at 6pm. You only wore your baggies, water shoes or slops and a rash vest if you had any hope of sleeping that night. It also included all your meals and drinks and you could borrow flippers and goggles there. Some of the crew also bought tickets to swim with dolphins which they really enjoyed.

The Gov and Flipper

After some greasy American and Mexican food and a few Corona's and Margarita's we tackled the Cliff of Courage" which was nothing more than a 4 metre drop into the river, we drifted down the river on tubes and stopped along the way to ride various slides and rope walks etc. Once at the end we topped up our drinks at one of the numerous Corona draught machines which were situated everywhere and climbed into some hammocks for an afternoon siesta.

The place to go after one too many Corona's.

A few water rides later and even more attempts to catch one of the numerous Iquanas that littered the place we made our way home. Back at the hotel I spotted the owner playing a guitar for his family and felt it only right to thank them for their hospitality with a South African love song. I snatched his guitar and proceeded to give my best rendition of Ryperd. The scary thing is that I dont know how to play Ryperd but these are minor details, it was the effort that mattered. An unimpressed owner claimed his beloved guitar back with a growl. I could have sworn that my coffee tasted a little more funky than usual the next morning.

Next we went to the Mayan ruins in Tulum and this was an incredible site even today long after the Spaniards had done their damage. We were encouraged to hire a guide as, we were assured, this would add to our experience as the Mayans were ahead of their time and super smart astrologists or something along those lines. In the end we got some short little old man who had a big head and even bigger ears and rambled so softly that we couldn't understand him. We named him Yoda for his size, his ears and for the way he constructed his sentences with complete disregard for the laws of the english language.


Yoda, in all his greatness.

As I said, the ruins were excellent but completely overrun by tourists. I dont think I have a single photo without a group of people in it.

Tulum Ruins

Our next stop was at the Grande Cenote. Now these puppies are natural underground caves filled with the cleanest and clearest water you have ever seen. You walk down some stairs, throw on your goggles and flippers and slowly make your way underground as far as you dare, swimming into the blackness. It is an eery yet breathtaking experience and my brother in law and I had to do our best to coax our respective Gov's into the caves.

We commented on the Scuba divers that we could see 10 or 12 metres below us who were swimming off into the kilometres of underground caves, to which someone said that it was just the other day that 5 went in and only 4 came out. Eish!


Top view of the entrance to Grande Cenote

With the rustic part of our Mexico trip completed we packed up and headed to Cancun and our stay at the Crown Palace Hotel.To be continued...

Monday 28 March 2011

New York you biscuit!

The gov, my wife, and I recently went on a trip to New York as part of a family vacation. We were fortunate enough to get some voyager miles from the family which meant all our flights were taken care of. All we had to do was pay for the hotel and all the odds and ends. So we broke open the piggy bank, counted our pennies and booked a special that Expedia had on offer to the New York Palace.

A long flight later and with very little sleep we arrived at JFK airport and caught a shuttle to our hotel.

WOW!!!

We arrived at the hotel and were immediately upgraded to a better room by the guy at the front desk as it was our first and probably last visit to the hotel and to New York. The view left us speechless...

St Patricks Cathedral

Eager to pound the pavement, we dumped our bags and headed straight across the road to the Cathedral for a look inside. The beauty of the place was absolutely incredible. When I looked across at the gov, she was actually crying. Naturally I apologised for whatever I must have done wrong but she was simply caught up in the place.

We probably averaged 10 to 15km day and night. Apparently there are places to avoid late at night but we never found them and walked around, quite happily, at midnight. By using the subway we covered most of the island in four days. We went to the Rockefeller Centre which lets you know, very quickly, how big and busy New York actually is.

The view of Central Park from the Top of the Rock.

We watched the Phantom of the Opera, the longest running show on Broadway, from front row seats after the Gov batted her eyelids at the cashier who promptly gave us 50% off. We walked Central Park which can easily take an entire day to get around. Visited the Raging Bull in Wall Street and the Twin towers site. We walked through Times Square at night which is a site to behold! There's enough advertising there to make a life long vegetarian head straight to Mickey D's!

Times Square

We took the Statten Island Ferry which goes past the Statue of Liberty and gave us some great pictures. Its free and fitted into my Scottish budget very well. For those who are travelling with their wives, girlfriends and/or secretaries do you best to avoid a place called Macy's. This place is like Gateway Shopping Centre on Steroids! 3 hours later, an extremely happy gov emerged followed by myself lugging plenty of shopping bags. A good place for some bargain shopping though.

We witnessed New York turn green as they celebrated St Patricks Day. We watched the parade for hours until our feet started to hurt. As the saying goes, you're either Irish or you wish you were Irish!

New York's finest on parade

We learnt the hard way that they don't include Vat in their advertised prices which is roughly 10%. Now, when you add this to the fact that waiters expect 15 - 20% tips on the bill, this means that you can add 25 - 30% to the price of everything when you eat out.

If you enjoy a beer or two your in for a bit of a shock. A beer at the bar at our hotel was going for $10 ex Vat which certainly did not fit into my Scottish budget. The best option I found was to buy them at the Smileys Deli where they went for $2.20 which is roughly R15.

Food is bit more expensive and they are crafty about getting a few extra dollars out of you. We sat at a burger restaurant and ordered a "Traditional American Cheeseburger" which was advertised at $5. I could only raise my eyebrow at what arrived. A roll, patty and a slice of cheese. When I inquired about the tomato, lettuce, onion etc I was then told that these were $1 each and when you added some fries too the meal, it came to about $10 each. Then add Vat and the tip which came to $12.50 a meal. Sneaky Russians!

One thing I must add is the overall friendliness of the New York people. Sure there were a few cheeky/rude bartenders and waiters which we had read about on Tripadvisor but every time we stopped on the street to check our map, someone would come up to us and ask if we needed assistance. Being from South Africa we naturally grabbed our backpack and wallets and prepared to be mugged but no. Just genuinely friendly people just wanting to help. Respect.
Prices aside it was unbelievable trip and we would go back tomorrow. Someone said to me that you can never describe New York to a person who hasn't been there. You have to go. He was quite right.

All work and no play.

"What is the meaning of life?" What is your answer to the age old question? Now, before you roll your eyes back for a closer inspection of your brain, give me a moment. This is simply asking some questions about our everyday lives and the way in which we live them.

Personally, I want my life to be fulfilling. I want to smile and be happy and do the things that make me happy 24/7. But how easy is it to achieve this simple idea in the current day and age? Lets look at the average week in our lives. The majority of us spend a third of a week at work which we don't enjoy, the second third sleeping which is a necessity and the final third we have to ourselves to do as we please. Now, reduce this final third to a fifth or 20%, if you will, as we are still driving, shopping, mowing, cooking, cleaning and all the other chores that we all have to do and that leaves us with 20% of enjoyment time. Think about it. How often are you happy or enjoying yourselves? 

So that's it? 20%? I'm not sure about you but that seems a little wrong to me. I want... no, no... I DEMAND more enjoyment time! But where do we find this extra time? I know that we all require different amounts of sleep. Take my wife for example. She has single handedly turned sleeping into an Olympic sport and she is the world record holder. The point is that we all need to sleep and this cannot be changed. Chores are chores, they rank right up there with death and taxes and unless you're at at the very top of the food chain you will need to do most these yourself. So that leaves us to explore our work.

Do you enjoy your work? Do you enjoy the people you work with? Does your job and your daily achievements better the human race in anyway? Are you happy with your salary? Do you wake up excited for work? Are you still smiling driving home from work? If the answer is "yes" to all then you are either one of the select 0.001% of the human race or you simply took one too many of your prescribed medication this morning. I reckon you could be satisfied if you said "yes" to half of the questions. Unfortunately, the most common answer to these questions is a resounding "no"! We could all think of better places to be and things to be doing but, alas, we have to work. We don't have a choice. The costs involved with being alive are ever present. 

"Do what you love" I hear you say and I couldn't agree with you more. Personally, I love animals and would love to work with animals, wild or domestic. I also love playing the guitar and would love to earn a salary writing music but a gifted Muso I am not. Neither, for that matter, will I ever be sharp enough to be a vet or famous wildlife filmmaker. Have you ever asked the average game ranger what they earn? Most people working for animal rescue places rely on donations to survive and often don't earn a salary and have to hold down a second job to pay their bills. I would love to work at the SPCA. I would find it immensely rewarding and would go home every day convinced that I have done some good. But the truth is, I simply cant afford to. Its sad that the people who work so selflessly to better mankind, wildlife and the planet are rewarded the least.

The world is moving quicker and its also getting smaller. Technology is rapidly improving every day. We can have face to face meetings with people across the world via our handheld device while we ride the bus from one meeting to another. Can you remember that twenty years ago the first cellular phone came out? Wow! How did we survive back then? You made calls on your land line and if the person was not there you left a message on a piece of paper and simply waited for them to return. Nowadays, if someone does not answer their cell phone, which is generally considered unacceptable, they are expected to get your voice mail and reply within the hour. We have to work longer hours so that our company can release a product sooner than our competitors. Nevermind if it does not work. Quality is out the window. Just get it out there first. Overtime is the norm. 

I don't know how our parents did it. Everyone had a house, two children, 2 dogs, 2 cats and a goldfish, of course. All of this while one of them stayed at home! Nowadays, only CEO's and your top managers can achieve this type of lifestyle. I haven't had children of my own yet but judging by how much my wife and I work, there would be very little time in our lives to watch them grow up.

While we marvel at the achievements of the human race have we forgotten to be human? Is 20% enough? How can we change it? Can the world move to a four day working week? How about we all go to work at 8am and then all get up and leave at 1pm? They cant fire the whole world can they? Go to http://www.2oceansvibe.com/ to see how seriously some people are pushing for no work on Friday afternoons. (What a great idea!)

We seem to be working more and more as every year goes by. If the average person lives 80 years and you apply the 20% rule, that leaves you with 16 years of your life to do what YOU want to do. Why not simply work as a waiter some evenings as you leave school to earn enough money to pay for cheap rent and food and party the rest away. 16 years later you would be 34 and you would have had your allotted fun time. Any extra is simply a bonus. Seriously, I know a guy who is 43 and still doing this! He's enjoyed almost every single day of his life so far and is quite aware, and happy, with the fact that he probably wont make it to old age.

Unfortunately this rant doesn't offer many solutions but simply asks that you look at yourself, your life and the way you work and ask yourself "What is important to me?" There's no right or wrong answer.